Get Your Worm off of that Nun!

“This fearful worm would often feed on cows and lamb and sheep,
And swallow little babes alive when they lay down to sleep.
So John set out and got the beast and cut it into halves,
And that soon stopped it eating babes and sheep and lambs and calves.”

–Lyrics to “The D’Ampton Worm” from The Lair of the White Worm

I am always seeking out anything that is bizarre and freaky and horror that has these two qualities are especially tantalizing to me. When my Manitou beast told me about a movie called The Lair of the White Worm (1988)....

...it really pulled on my peculiar strings and I was very curious about it. So recently I took this film in and I must say it was quite entertaining in, yep you guessed it, a peculiar way.

The film was written and directed by Ken Russell,

and if you know anything of his work, you’ll understand how odd it can be. His style is usually quite controversial in nature.

To me, this movie is not scary at all but just takes your mind on a trip through a cheesy but twisted, Gothic fantasy world. I mean, who knows, some people might consider this movie to be horrific because of its disturbing nature…I guess it just depends on the person. Just beware that this movie is oozing with sexual and religious connotations.

So the movie stems around two sisters who run a Bed & Breakfast Inn on the British countryside, and there is an archaeological dig taking place on the grounds. Hugh Grant plays the boyfriend of one of the sisters.

The man who is doing the digging finds a large skull artifact that is assumed to be a dinosaur’s of some sort.

Then a strange woman who lives in a nearby mansion appears and sneaks into the house and upon seeing a crucifix on the wall has this reaction (one of my favorite parts)…nice!  I mean WOW such spew precision!  I am so sloppy compared to this squirty bitch.

And while she’s there she takes the skull because it is actually NOT a Dino skull but rather the skull of a great worm that she happens to worship.

Then when one of the sisters returns to the Inn she notices the liquid on the cross and goes to touch it and immediately has an extremely crazy hallucination of nuns being beaten and raped

and of a man on a cross with a worm thing wrapped around him and munching on his arm…yum.

This strange woman starts having some sadistic fun with some of the men and boys in the neighborhood

and she starts to show her true monstrous colors, and that be blue.

She also kidnaps one of the sisters who just happens to be a virgin at which time the woman is seen walking around with a very phallic looking horn strapped to her lower extremities….yikes!

Pretty much whoever gets bitten turns into a vicious vampire-like monster….including the town policeman.

All in all this movie was fun to watch and very entertaining and yeah it was pretty wildly strange.

I also want to throw in the fact that it was kinda hard for me to understand everything the characters were saying because of the heavy British accents, BUT really, the dialog doesn’t play too much of a factor in this movie in my eyes.

I’ll send you off with a clip of one of my favorite Hugh Grant scenes.

 

Signed,

Filthy Regan 

 

Originally Posted on September 27, 2010